To Drink or to Stink

Upon arrival in Korea I had to buy a couple of more towels. The one lonely towel I packed wasn’t faring well under the strain of drying me off twice a day. So I got it some new friends who turned out to be jerks that like to explode dark blue lint all over everything no matter how many times they are washed and dried. Then there is the problem that regardless of how often I wash them or what techniques I employ, they stink in less than four or five uses. Usually, I can get two uses before any hint of mildew creeps in. At best, I get two days out of one. At two showers a day that equals three towels a week and I still fall short of what’s needed for that. Boom! Look at me math.

Look. I’m a laundry once a week kind of guy. I am also a problem solver kind of guy. So I did what many of us might do these days when faced with stinky bathroom textiles: I sought the sage advice that can only be found on the internet. I stumbled upon a page espousing natural “life hacks” for people who don’t like man made cleaning agents. I assume from reading this that vodka isn’t man made and is mistaken by some to be a cleaning agent. This seriously sounds anti-hacky to me, but I guess it makes sense now that I think about it. I’ve never been near someone sloshed on vodka and thought “Wow. He smells really mildewy”. The idea is to spritz your towels after they dry and the fermented potato juice will kill the smell. Or maybe make the smell drunk so it falls off the towel. I don’t know how it works.

The point is not that I know how it works. You remember how I mentioned that liqueur is rationed on post in Korea? Yeah? Well. It is adversely affecting towels. That is the point. If you are reading this, send vodka.

4 thoughts on “To Drink or to Stink

    1. Hmmmm. But then I’d have to render it into a spritzable/drinkable form. I guess I could just rub the taters on the towel, but that seems like it would just defeat the purpose of showering. If I just drank vodka would the mildew stink transferred to my skin go away?

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I used to be able to get dryer sheets that contained formaldehyde and would put them all over the boat to combat mildew & bugs in Seattle rain when we were dry-docked. It kept the mildew at bay, not sure how good it is/was for human skin. Also not sure if the ‘stink’ of mildew or the chemically smell of the dryer sheets was worse. I think this qualifies as one of those ‘sacrifice of praise’ moments in time.

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